At a ripe old age of 27, I think I have been a living a very frivolous life.
What started off a habit has however,started to come across as an addiction, an uncontrollable urge to shop.
Everyone I know likes pretty things. That's normal. There will be time for a splurge and time to cave in impulse purchases. I'm sure that is normal too. For myself, I have soft spot for clothes ( another smaller spot for everything else). To say that my closet is bursting is an understatement.
From time to time, I will ponder and analyse my actions and of course, the motivations behind them. Has the whole experience of shopping and owning an item of beauty part of an attempt to (over)compensate the insecurities I have brought over from my teenage years ?( Being taunted for being fat and unattractive in high school has remained, the most unfortunate and embarrassing incident in my life.)Or has that impulsive behaviour manifested from the dissatisfaction lying beneath my consciousness? Is it true that I'm bored with life?
Sometimes, it's so strange that the more I earn, the most I spend.
Like many addicts, it is always easy to justify a purchase or to cave in to temptations. Unlike most of them, I think I am pretty aware that this is a problem I have to overcome in order to build my big fat financial nest which I always want.
If you think why the hell I am airing my own dirty laundry out here, whining about my weaknesses and the inability to exert control on oneself, think again. I would say, this is akin to staring yourself at the mirror,except that you are looking at yourself so deeply that it will rob you of your basic humanity if you ever dare flinch. Why be afraid of yourself when it is just..... you?
I don't believe in never falling, but getting up again when you fall. I believe in the strength, the courage and persistence required to stand up after the fall.
All those people who said they never fail, that they are all saints, we know they are liars. They are lying.
So let's get back to the topic I was harping on, I am still not too sure how to overcome this irritating habit of mine but I'll figure.
I have read somewhere that we tend to shop less when we hang out with non-shopaholics ( I think they just meant people who has less inclination to shop i.e. with less control or just not particularly interested in collecting 'things'). To all my un-shopaholic friends, I will appreciate greatly if you decide to go out with me more.
I'm nice and I don't bite.
However, it has been said that I tend to produce the effect of inducing non shopaholics to purchase they didn't think they need. Why, i should be a saleswoman no?
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